Sliding Down the Slippery Slope

This week I hit a speed bump. A friend challenged me, and it brought up a lot of fears and negative self-talk for me. The challenge was not even a bad thing; she challenged me to put my Elements of Abundance course out for everyone, whether I feel ready or not. By having a deadline with people depending on me, I will show up and make it happen.

It’s a proven concept – part of the reason I started a women’s spiritual circle oh-so-many years ago was that I would do the work for myself. To be able to lead others, I needed to learn and grow myself.

This summer, when I was off work, I was very excited to create a group coaching program. The idea was I would be able to launch it around the time I went back to work. But I got stuck with the process I was working on creating, and then I got sidetracked with the 30/60 blog and video challenge, and before I knew it I was back at work, with nothing more than a title and an idea for my course.

I don’t regret doing the challenge. It helped me get into creating videos, and definitely increased my website hits. I see that as a very good thing.

slippery slopeThere’s still a part of me that is disappointed that I didn’t achieve what I set out to this summer, and now that it is almost mid-winter, I’m starting to wonder if I will. Between work, helping my son with his schoolwork, coaching, and circle, there’s precious little time left in the day. Not to mention any energy necessary to actually create.

I started checking out this week. I borrowed movies from the library and stayed up late watching them. I slept in each morning instead of meditating trying to make up the sleep I lost staying up late the night before. I didn’t even look at my journal, much less write in it, and I didn’t check my email most of the week.

I was sliding down the slippery slope to hopelessness. Maybe I’m not meant to create this course. Who am I to teach about abundance to others when I am so immersed in my own lack? Maybe it would be better if I resigned myself to going to work, coming home and distracting myself however I can, and doing it all over the next day.

How do you pull yourself out of that? Well, here are a few things I did:

  1. Cry. Yes, I really mean cry. Your tears help release the excess stress chemicals from your body, so let ’em flow!
  2. Journal. Get the thoughts down on paper and out of your head. I wrote in my journal while watching an X-Men movie with my boys.
  3. Get a good night’s sleep. Your body repairs and heals during sleep, and that means lowering stress levels as well.
  4. Take some time for self-care. I took a bath, used some body lotion I enjoy the smell of, and painted my toenails. Treat yourself to a personal spa day, in whatever way you can.
  5. Get a different perspective. Sometimes, I just need to talk it out. I spent an hour or so letting my husband know what I was feeling, and he gave me a different view on some of the challenges we are facing.
  6. Be gentle with yourself. Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you are feeling. Don’t stay there forever, but don’t try to squash the feelings either.
  7. Do something for someone else. For me, this was helping my son sew some lavender eye pillows for his Young Entrepreneur project. I felt needed and valuable helping him do something he couldn’t quite do on his own. Its a small ego boost, and from down here, every little bit helps.

I’m still feeling a little down, but I’m nowhere near as broken as I felt less than 24 hours ago. I’m still scared of giving myself a deadline, but it’s not as terrifying as it was earlier in the week. I keep reminding myself of this:

There are no unrealistic goals – only unrealistic timelines.

I’m not giving up, just resetting the clock.

Blessings,

Mary

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