“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” ~Albert Einstein

In coming out from my trip to the Underworld (otherwise known as emotional breakdown, depression, freak out, etc), I remembered this quote from Einstein.  If I really want to change my circumstances, I need to change how I think about them.

I had two conversations last week with friends that helped me get more clarity about what it is that I am really wanting. (Incidentally, both of them are Peaceful Women.) The first happened by synchronicity – because it certainly wasn’t planned, nor was it an accident.

I was on the Peaceful Woman conference line because I thought there was supposed to be a group call.  Only three of us ended up being on the call, so we started to share what had been going on recently for each of us.  I listened to the exciting things that the other two had been doing, and I almost didn’t want to share. I did anyway, and one of the women asked me a question about my situation that many have asked before about why my husband doesn’t do something different.

My first thought was, “Great. Here I go again having to defend choices my husband and I have made.” I briefly explained, and she simply answered, “OK. That’s the vision that I will hold for you then.”

I was shocked. I thanked her right away, and told her how much it meant to me that she didn’t question me or my choices. She just accepted me, and told me she would hold positive space for me. It helped me realize that part of what contributed to my meltdown was having to defend my choices from other people’s suggestions. I was craving this kind of support – acceptance of where I am, and assistance in holding the vision of what I want to create.

Later in the week, I had the wonderful opportunity to speak with another Peaceful Woman who is also an amazing Life Coach.  She helped me find even more clarity about why I was feeling so stressed (by uncovering exactly what about my changed circumstances at work was challenging my values), and why I was sabotaging myself from continuing all my positive habits (because they are things I have control over, and I was feeling very out of control in other areas of my life). Simply having the higher awareness of what was really going on for me opened up the space in me to shift my perception.

She also acknowledged me for the growth I have experienced, and for the steps I have already taken to change my perception. I have spoken my truth more fully, and I am beginning to integrate this visit to the Underworld into my entire being, in support of positive change. By crying out to the Universe for help, and being honest that I don’t know what the next step is, the Universe has placed at least three new opportunities before me to provide the help I was asking for.

That’s another interesting shift for me. I don’t feel bad or regret having this meltdown, as I might have done in the past. It is not a sign of weakness. I know that this is part of a cycle towards my own spiritual evolution.

And so I am grateful for the opportunity to learn more about myself.  By getting such a clear message about what I don’t want, and taking the time to explore what led me to this place, I am so much more clear on what it is that I do want. I’m not all the way there yet. And I feel so much better about how I’ve begun.

Blessings,

Mary