Changing my reaction

By Mary on May 17, 2010

I was going to write about my recent experiences with the Peaceful Woman’s Maui Facilitator Passage, but that was before I opened the dryer and found two crayons–one red and one yellow–in with the clothes.

I was completely derailed.  Instead of catching up on email, and writing my blog post for today, I ended up spending two hours spraying the newly nulti-colored clothes with stain remover and scrubbing them with a toothbrush.  And I did not react very well.  I was cranky and grouchy.  I cried at one point from sheer frustration.  I took my anger out on my husband and my youngest son by yelling at them.  Yes, I became downright bitchy.  I’m not very proud of myself.

As my anger cooled, I reflected on my reaction.  Utilizing tools I have learned from The Peaceful Woman, and Peak Potentials, I wondered if this is how I always react to situations that disrupt my plans.  Thinking about other experiences that I have had recently, I have to admit that up until now, I have not reacted well to unpleasant surprises.  There are exceptions, of course.  There are times when I am able to go with the flow, but those are usually times when I have not created the schedule.

The first step to changing a belief, or behavior pattern, is to be aware that it is there.  I am now aware that I react with anger when my schedule goes off track.  I have observed myself in a behavior that does not serve me.

Now that I am aware of the behavior I want to change, I can catch myself earlier and earlier in the pattern, and soon I will be able to catch myself *before* the pattern kicks in. I can choose to act in a different way, one that serves my highest good, and does not hurt those that I love.  I can choose peace.  More important, I can choose!

I have also apologized to my husband and son.  I am so grateful to have such a wonderful, loving family!

Blessings,

Mary

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The Energy of Money

By Mary on April 12, 2010

It’s tax time for many people, and so money is in our thoughts a lot right now.  Money has been a big issue for me, and one of the things that I have been working to retrain my mind about in the last year and a half is that money is just another form of energy.

There are lots of cliches about money.  Consciously or not, these cultural teaching affect how we interact with money.  I have been working on my abundance mindset, and being in the flow of money, having it flow to me and through me effortlessly and abundantly.

The other morning, I found myself slipping back into some old thought patterns: I need more money for ______; How am I going to pay for _______; I still owe ______; etc.

Then I gave myself a mental shake.  I recognized the old pathway my mind was travelling down, and I consciously stepped off of that old path.

“Wait a second!” I thought to myself.  “I have just had an abundance of energy and money flow through me in the past couple of weeks!”  Ok, it flowed through me, and went out just as fast as it came in, but I was in the flow.  My bills are paid, and the money I needed for a couple of unplanned things (car repairs!) was there for me when I needed.

In that moment, my whole energy shifted.  Instead of being worried and tense, I was relaxed and peaceful.  Instead of being anxious, I felt extremely grateful.  I am now aware that an experience I was looking for in my life is present, right here and right now, and it gives me the sustaining faith that I will continue to have this experience.  I AM in the flow, and I AM manifesting abundance in my life!

To what do I credit the shift in consciousness?  It started with the Millionaire Mind Intensive in October of 2008, which helped me to start changing my beliefs about money. This led to other courses and events with Peak Potentials, which helped me break through some of the fears that were holding me back and build a network of supportive, positive people who have goals and beliefs similar to mine.  Then my husband and I attended CEO Space in May of 2009, which expanded my vision of what I am here to do in the world and led me to The Peaceful Woman.  Most recently, I have been taking part in The Peaceful Woman’s Inspired Living Coaching Program, and that has helped me be aware of what I want to manifest, and become conscious of when I am manifesting those experiences into my life.

Here are a couple of the books I have read that have helped me create this positive change:

I’d love to hear about your relationship with money, and any tips you have for making it a positive one!

Blessings,

Mary

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How do I show up in the world?

By Mary on March 15, 2010

I am vicariously taking part in an 8 week coaching program with The Peaceful Woman called Inspired Living.  I say vicariously  because I am not able to take part during the live call, but I can go back and listen to the recording.  Last week was the first session, and I just listened to the call today.

We did an assessment of our lives–looking at various areas and how fulfilled we are by those parts of our lives, and how different areas of our lives support us.  This was an interesting exercise for me.  Some of these areas I knew were not fulfilling me, and I’m working to change that.  Some areas that on first thought I would have said were great, after listening to the discussion I decided I really could be more fulfilled in that area of my life.   Areas that I would have said are not supporting me, really do support me more than I think.

After looking at the balance, or really, lack of balance, in my life, I have to ask myself some powerful questions: How am I showing up in the world?  How do I want to show up in the world?  How different are the answers? And what do I need to do to bring them into alignment?

I feel that I am showing up as Super Mom, an overachiever who has so many things to do, one wonders how any of it gets done.  And I do feel like I have too many projects on the go, but I am not sure how to pare it back.   Each project feels essential to one or another of my goals.  And yet, if I don’t slow down, I may crash.  I notice I go through this cycle from time to time, usually when I have fallen behind on my daily meditation, journal writing, and/or exercise, all of which has happened lately.

The answers to the other questions are going to take a little more time, meditation and reflection to answer.  As requested by my coach, I have chosen a theme for the rest of 2010: My life supports my purpose and my purpose supports my life.  I’m still working to bring all the areas of my life into alignment with my purpose.  I’ll keep you posted as I work out the answers to these questions!

If you know me, how do I show up for you?  Or, how do YOU show up in the world, and how does that compare to how you want to show up?

Blessings,

Mary

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Peaceful Woman Maui Passage Feb 2010

By Mary on March 1, 2010

I can’t believe it’s already been two weeks since I returned home from assisting with the most recent Maui Facilitator’s Passage.  Since it’s officially March, I can even say it was last month!  How quickly the time passes.

As always when I return home from a retreat or course, or really any time I have been away on my own, I am faced with the opportunity of integrating what I’ve learned into my daily life.  Sometimes it is easier than others!

It was very interesting to experience the Maui Passage through new eyes – having gone through it once already six months ago.  Here’s a video of me on the last day of the Passage last August:

Aside from getting to meet 10 incredible new women and deepening my connection with four women I met last time, going through the Passage for a second time helped to anchor a lot of the things I had learned on my initial Passage.  For example, in August I had some challenges with “Flow Day”.  When the day didn’t go as I thought it should, I became upset.  I’ve been working on that over the past six months (my youngest son is a wonderful teacher who goes with the flow all the time), and I felt a lot more ease this time around.

And I learned some new things as well.  On “Volcano Day”, I went and visited a heiau, a sacred place, up a hill that I had missed visiting in August.  On the way back down to the beach, I had an aha message: “Stop searching for the significance of every moment, and allow each moment to be significant.”  I saw that many times I work really hard to figure out why something is special, or push for the message I am supposed to receive.  I don’t always get one.  But when I am able to be truly present in an experience, rather than observing myself in it, I find much more profound meaning and insight.

On “Waterfall Day”, the experiences and the women in the February Passage reflected back to me that I am strong and a good leader.  I saw that while my body may not look or feel much different, the work I have been doing to take better care of my physical body is making a difference.  I was able to run up a hill at one point, something that would have winded me even six months ago.  And when I planted myself in order to assist other women, I was stable and unshakable.

Going back to Maui completely reaffirmed for me that this work is what I want to be doing, and this company is totally in alignment with my purpose and values.  I am excited to announce that I will be starting a Peaceful Woman Meet Up group this month, and I will be facilitating Maui Passages August 15th-21st, and September 12th-18th, 2010.  I would love to have you join me!  You will be expanded, enlightened, and peaceful, in your own way and through your own experience.

Blessings,

Mary

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Control Issues

By Mary on January 18, 2010

Hello.  My name is Mary, and I have control issues.

Not the stereotypical”EVERYTHING MUST GO MY WAY!” kind of control issues. There are some things I just don’t care about. Like the nightly dinner time conversation:

“What do you want to have for dinner?”

“I don’t know.  What do you want to have?”

But I’ve never been completely drunk, because as soon as I start feeling tipsy, and like I’m losing control, I stop. (That, and I don’t really like the taste of alcohol…) I just want to have control over my life.  I didn’t think that was asking much, really!

Apparently, the need for control leads to a lot of struggle.  And a fair bit of disappointment.  I speak from experience.  Take my guided meditations for example.  I had the idea that over my holiday break from work, I was going to get pages written for every one that I had completed recording.  There are nine of them.  It is now more than two weeks past my time off, and there are three pages up.

Why is that? Because life had different plans for me–time spent with my children, helping a really good friend, another project with a high priority to finish (meaning I was getting paid for it). And I caused myself pain by feeling guilty about not getting my website done. I still cause myself some pain about it.

But I’m getting some pretty clear messages from the Universe that it is time for me to let go of that need to control.  I need to go with the flow, and follow where I am led.  Besides getting that message during meditation, the other day the daily message on my Marianne Williamson Daily Wisdom Calendar said:

“Until your knees finally hit the floor, you’re just playing at life, and on some level you’re scared because you know you’re just playing.  The moment of surrender is not when life is over.  It’s when it begins.”

I’ve also been drawing a Crystal Ally Card each night before bed.  Three nights ago, I drew Aquamarine -Release.  The description said,

“Give away the energy of control, and have faith that the Universe will use that energy to create what is in your highest good. Allow the light of Spirit to enter and fill your body and mind.”

And then today, as I sat down to write this post, another friend needed some healing.  So two hours later, I’m now back at it, and mulitasking.

So I’m working to let go of control, and go with the flow. How am I doing that?

  1. Breathe and get centered.
  2. Tune in to my intuition, Divine Wisdom, Higher Self.  This feels like an opening of my heart.
  3. Ask for input.  “What do I do next?”
  4. Listen for the answer.
  5. Act on the message I receive.

Yes, sometimes this is a lot easier said than done.  And sometimes I completely forget to do it. Like I said, I’m working on this one. The Peaceful Woman Maui Passage has a whole day devoted to this lesson. I’m very much looking forward to that when I go back in February. And my youngest son is an awesome teacher!

Blessings,

Mary

PS. I just read my “Notes from the Universe” for today, and got a good chuckle!

Expecting “end results” – such as wealth and abundance, health and harmony, friends and laughter – in broad brush strokes, is part of the secret formula, Mary, for manifesting the life of your dreams.

Expecting your path to follow a certain route – such as writing a bestseller to accumulate wealth, having a particular someone fall in love with you, or insisting upon this idea, that diet, or the other invention to be your deliverance – is just plain messing with the cursed hows and severely limits my options… (I hate when that happens.)

Cool?
The Universe

PS. Release any expectations you may have of how you think your dreams will come true, Mary, but by all means, with every fiber of your being, expect that they will, as you busy yourself enjoying who and where you already are.

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The Pain of Discipline vs. the Pain of Regret

By Mary on December 28, 2009

I have several practices that I do on a regular basis: yoga, journal writing, and meditation. Over the holidays, and the time leading up to the holidays, my discipline at maintaining these practices has been slipping. As someone with a history of procrastination, I have had any number of reasons (read: excuses) as to why I cannot do any or all of them. Since I practice first thing in the morning, and right before bed, many of my excuses revolve around sleep.

“I stayed up too late last night, so I ‘m going to sleep a little later this morning.”

“I feel a cold coming on, so I am going to rest more to fight it off.”

“I have to finish reading this book so I can get it back to the library.”

Thinking of these three practices (yoga, meditation and journal writing), it can be difficult to measure the effects of doing or not doing them.  If I don’t brush my teeth before bed, it’s easy to relate that to furry teeth and horrible morning breath when I wake up.  If I don’t put my raw breakfast on to soak before I go to bed, I have to have something else to eat in the morning. But is the late afternoon headache coming on because I didn’t do yoga, or because I didn’t drink enough water today?  And am I irritable because I didn’t write in my journal or meditate last night, or because my hormones are changing with the onset of my moon time?

And then there is the guilt.  I made a commitment to myself to practice yoga at least three times a week, and to journal and meditate before bed at least 5 times a week.  If I can’t keep my commitments to myself, how trustworthy am I?  And if I am not keeping my commitments, I am not in alignment, and I am not attracting the things I want into my life.

Why did I make these commitments in the first place?  Yoga helps keep me flexible and is a good way of combating chronic plain.  Writing in my journal and meditating help me stay balanced emotionally, and help me feel calm and peaceful.  I am able to stay focused longer and accomplish more.  And frankly, I don’t like what I become when I am not practicing.

So while it may always seem easier to follow an excuse and not get up for yoga, or short myself on meditation time so I can get back into whatever book I am reading, I almost always end up regretting the decision.  Discipline is much more challenging to maintain, but it is so much easier to live with than the regret of not following the discipline.

Keep this in mind as you make your New Year’s Resolutions, if you partake in that ritual.  Will you be self-disciplined enough to keep your commitment?

Blessings,

Mary

PS. How do I best impart this lesson, which has taken me over 30 years to understand (and I still haven’t gotten it perfect!), to my young sons? :)

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Chocolate Meditation

By Mary on December 23, 2009

The Peaceful Woman has recently begun Meet-Ups throughout the US and Canada.  The premiere meet-up theme was, “When you can’t access Peaceful, reach for Chocolate!”

At first this sounds like a sales pitch for Hershey’s, but when you get past that, it is really a metaphor to remind us to slow down and access our center.

Rachel Flower, a fellow Peaceful Woman, created a special Chocolate Sensory Meditation for the meet-ups, and it is available to download and experience for yourself.  You will never eat chocolate the same way again!

Blessings,

Mary

Get your free full-length guided meditation here.

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Getting Into Alignment

By Mary on November 25, 2009

I had an aha! moment the other night as I was writing in my journal.  I’m feeling the need to go to another personal development conference or workshop.

I’ve been to several really amazing ones in the past year, and I always come home feeling on top of the world and soaring with energy.  The last one I went to was The Peaceful Woman in August.  While I am blessed to participate in weekly phone calls with a group of Peaceful Women, and even more blessed to have an in-depth check in with one woman in particular, it’s not quite the same as being in the same space with others of like mind.

Why is that?

The conclusion I came to is that regularly going to conferences or workshops and being in a group of self-aware or high vibration people is like going to the chiropractor.  My body gets so used to being out of alignment, that it becomes the norm.  If I don’t have an adjustment for a while, then I need to go several times to get my body used to being in alignment.  With regular maintenance, being in alignment becomes the norm.

The same can be said for my energy body.  A year ago I went to three weekend intensives in three months.  I was pumped, excited, and it set a really good precedence for the year.  Then, I couldn’t keep up with the expense and the time away from work, so I didn’t go for a while, and my energy lagged.  This summer, I went to a few more, but now it has been three months and I am feeling the need for re-alignment.

The phone calls are kind of like the chiropractor just adjusting my lower back, or just my neck, but not my whole spine.  It helps, but it’s not as good as the full meal deal.  I’m working to manifest a couple of trips in the next couple of months to help get me back into full spiritual alignment, alignment with my soul’s purpose.  In the mean time, I’m continuing my meditation and journal writing practices for my mind and spirit, like my yoga practice for my body.

Because I now appreciate the value of regular adjustments, physically, mentally and spiritually.

Blessings,

Mary

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