Breathe Love

By Mary on June 7, 2010

The other night I woke up in quite a lot of pain.  The muscles all up and down my back were spasming.  I prefer not to take medication until all my other options have run out.  I also avoid getting out of bed if I can! :)

So I started by slowing down my breath.  When I’m in pain, like most people, my breathing gets shallow and quick. Then I started a technique that my dad taught me when he was learning to manage chronic pain.  With each inhale, think, “I am.”  With each exhale think, “Calm.”  Each breath affirms that your entire being is calm.

I have used this technique to successfully manage pain and anxiety in the past.  This time, a flash of inspiration came to me.  Change the word “calm” to “love!” I AM…LOVE. Now each breath affirms that my entire being is love!

I instantly felt my pain level decrease.  After only a few breaths, I felt my heart expand, and a feeling of peace and joy washed over me.  My mind kept taking me out of the experience to analyze what I was feeling so that I could write about it this week, and I would return to focusing on the breath.  I AM…LOVE.  I AM…LOVE. My heart expanded, and I felt a deeper connection with my family, and soon with the world outside.  I was in unity.  I was relaxed.  The pain was not completely gone, but it was significantly decreased to the point that I was able to go back to sleep.  And I felt great!

For a deeper meditation experience, do this in combination with alternate nostril breathing.  Here’s how:

  1. Hold your right hand up, palm facing you.
  2. Bend your index finger and middle finger down, leaving your thumb, ring, and pinky fingers up.
  3. Using your ring finger to hold your left nostril closed, inhale through the right nostril for a count of four.  (Think, “I AM.”)
  4. Release your left nostril and using your thumb to hold your right nostril closed, exhale for a count of eight. (Think, “LOVE.”)
  5. Continue holding the right nostril with your thumb, and inhale for a count of four.  (Think, “I AM.”)
  6. Release your right nostril, hold your left nostril closed with your ring finger, and exhale for a count of eight. (Think, “LOVE.”)
  7. Lather, rinse, repeat three to seven times.

Alternate nostril breathing activates both sides of the brain.  Even practicing here while I am typing out the instructions, I can feel the positive effects!  Let me know what you experience.

Blessings,

Mary

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An Invitation…

By Mary on May 24, 2010

I recently returned home from The Peaceful Woman Maui Facilitator Passage.  This is the third time I have gone, and it continues to amaze me.  Or rather, I continue to amaze myself.

How do you describe your own inner journey to someone else? How do you put deeply personal and meaningful “aha” moments into words?  The Peaceful Woman Maui Passage is a week long journey into your own truth.  And each time I return, I learn more and more about myself.  I learn how to cut through the noise in my own head, to drop into that still place inside myself where my soul resides.  I learn how to be the observer in my own life–how am I occurring in this situation?  And what does that say about how I occur in the rest of my life?

I arrive open to the teachings this time and this place have prepared for me, vulnerable in the knowledge that I have manifested the experiences that will take me to the next level.  I am here to support the other women on their journey, and I allow myself to be supported, by conscious women who become soul sisters, as well as by Mother Maui, a magical island that has much to share.  I tune in, listening to the requests of the women with me on this Passage, my body,  and Mother Nature all around me, knowing they are all reflections of my innermost Divine self.  I share my experiences and insights, and soak up the breakthrough moments like the rays of brilliant sunshine.

I dance the ancient dance, blessing the land, and walk the labyrinth to my center and back.  I am cleansed in the river of feminine energy, and purified in the ocean where the ancients landed their canoes.  I am teleported to the sacred place where the sky meets the land, from which messages are sent and received.  I walk the fields of heat and passion, sweat out the stones that block my Light, and claim my blessings.  I sway with strong bamboo, bathe in healing waterfalls, and am pampered into a state of relaxed bliss.  I unite with my sisters to carry us swiftly across the waves to sing to the turtles, and swim amidst rainbow colored fish.  I celebrate the journey with dancing, singing and feasting!

And throughout I am treated to the wisdom of the Hawai’ian culture.

Experience is a better teacher than any book, and nature is the best classroom there is.

This is my truth, and I choose to live from this place of peace and power.  I invite you to join me, to know your truth, and live your truth. I am leading Peaceful Woman Maui Passages August 15th-21st, and September 12th-18th, and there are other dates with other incredible facilitators available. For a limited time, you can get 10% off the full price of your Passage.  Please enter coupon code “MM”.  There are also limited spaces for facilitators still available.  Contact me here if that is something you are interested in.

Here’s my experience from my first Passage:

Blessings,

Mary

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Stuff

By Mary on April 26, 2010

Last week after the funeral, I helped my parents and my sister clean out my Grandmother’s apartment.  Just a few months ago, she had moved from a larger apartment to this smaller one that we were clearing out, so she had already downsized and gotten rid of quite a bit of her stuff.  She had told my father and my sister about the history of several items from the family or with significant sentimental value, and many of these had already been set aside or given away to family members.  So most of what was left was decoration, or everyday household items.

I’ve watched “The Story of Stuff” several times with my children, and I’ve worked to tame my own pack-rat tendencies.  I was a FlyBaby for a while, though I have fallen out of practice.  So in my mind there is a war between saving the landfill, and saving my home from becoming a landfill.  Much of Grandma’s belongings were donated to Churches United for the Homeless, and the medical equipment went to HERO (Healthcare Equipment Recycling Organization).  Both of these are organizations my Grandmother’s generosity did support or would have supported.  Some things went to the dumpster.  And a lot went back to my parent’s home.

I kept being asked if I wanted any of her household items.  If I did not live so far away, and have to figure out how to get it home, I might have said yes to more things.  Thankfully, I did not come home burdened with a lot of “stuff”.

There was a potential for hard feelings in the family with some of the sentimental items. I’m not sure where Grandma’s will was, or whether or not she specified who got which items.  So there was a challenge between two family members over one item.  Apparently Grandma had told each of them at different times that they could have the item.  There was a certain amount of tension all week about it.  Fortunately, it was resolved by the end of the week.

It really made me think about an audio course I listened to several years ago, called LegaLees, by Lee Phillips.  Much of the course was about asset protection, but he also goes into wills and probate.  He uses the phrase, “the dollies and the doilies,” frequently in that section, and when it came to who got what, that phrase kept going through my mind.  Ultimately, none of Grandma’s “stuff” was so important to me that it was worth hurting the relationships with my family members.  I was not attached to the material possessions.  Yes, I did come home with a few of them, but if someone else in my family really wanted them, I would have acquiesced to their desires, because relationships are more important than things.  Most of my family felt the same way, and for that i am truly grateful.

Now I hope that I can impart that same feeling to my own children.

Blessings,

Mary

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Grief

By Mary on April 13, 2010

My grandmother is dying.

Her health has been going downhill for the last two years, but my family is on death watch now.

This feels like deja vu.

Two years ago, my parents came out to spend some time with my children while my husband and I went away for a spiritual retreat over Easter.  My mom’s mother was dying at that time, and my dad’s mother had heart surgery and was in the hospital.  Within a week after my parents got back home, my mom’s mother passed away.

Three weeks ago, my parents came to spend some time with my children while my husband and I were away at separate business conferences, and then away again for a spiritual retreat over Easter.  They have been home for just over a week, and we don’t expect my dad’s mom to last through this week.

I’m still in the early stages of grief.  It’s painful to think of losing my last grandparent, the fun grandma.  My dad is an only child, so my sister and I were her only grandchildren, and we got spoiled by her.  While I was growing up, she and my grandfather lived in a house on a lake, and we spent many weekends there…swimming in summer and sledding in the winter; playing card games in the dining room overlooking the lake; enjoying the fire in the fireplace.

After I got married and moved away, she would come and spend a week with us to see her great grandchildren every year, until she was no longer able to travel with ease.  Every week she wrote me letters, and later emails about how her week went and what things she did.

Logic tells me she is just graduating this plane of existence.  She will get to be with my grandfather again (he died 25 years ago).  She won’t be suffering anymore.  She’s lived a full and good life.

And I will miss her very much.

I love you, Iris Swenson.  And I am so grateful that you have been such an important part of my life.

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Responsibility

By Mary on January 11, 2010

Many teachers and gurus talk about the importance of taking responsibility for everything in our lives.  On one level, I totally get it.  Everything, good and bad that has happened to me, all of my current circumstances are a result of choices I have made.  I understand, and I accept it.

At another level, I struggle with this lesson. Over and over again.

Here’s how that plays out in my life.

I get a great idea, or an opportunity comes my way.  I get excited about the project, and make plans for how I will accomplish it.  I get started, and then it hits me…I have three young children.

I become overwhelmed by my perceived time pressure.  Between work, spending time with my children and my husband, my journal writing, meditation and spiritual practices, home chores and the new responsibility of whatever the project of the moment is, I start to feel burned out.

I want to be Super Woman, and do it all! The fact remains that I am a mortal woman who gets cranky when I don’t get enough sleep.  Not to mention self care!

At times, I have arranged for others to care for my children while I pursue my vision/idea/opportunity.  I end up missing them, they miss me, and they start acting out to get my attention.  And, I didn’t have children so I could pass them off to someone else to raise.  While my children have never been this out of control…

Responsibility? funny picture

…there are times when my house gets a little out of control!  Like now for instance.  One is in the bath, and two are chasing each other in circles around the house.  And I’m working on this blog post.  This would be one of those Calgon moments, right?

There are so many things I want to go out and do.  So many things I want to accomplish.  And so much of my children’s lives I would miss were I to take off and pursue all those things.

I sometimes console myself with the fact that I am still pretty young, and I will have plenty of time to pursue those dreams as the boys grow older.  They are only young once, right?  Or, if I miss one opportunity now, another bigger and better opportunity awaits me.  And still I struggle with wanting to do it all. NOW!  The fact remains that I chose to become a mother, and for all my complaining, I really enjoy growing with my children.

Since this theme keeps recurring in my life, it’s obviously one of those life lessons that is going to keep coming up until I truly figure it out.  Or until they all grow up and move out of the house.  Nahhh, who am I kidding?  I will still want to do more things than I have time to do! :)

So, how about you?  How do you balance all your responsibilities?  Do you fully accept responsibility for all aspects of your life?

Responsibility Quote

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Happy New Year!

By Mary on January 1, 2010

Tick, tock.  The calendar turns another page.  Here is my wish for you for 2010:

Infinite Love, Infinite Abundance

Infinite Love, Infinite Abundance

May you know Peace,

May you know Joy,

May you know Love,

May you know Infinite Blessings!

Mary

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