Speeding into 2012

By Mary on January 2, 2012

Time is speeding up. How often have you said to yourself, “Where did this day/week/month go?” Or, “How can it be the end of the month already?” I catch myself saying this all the time, and I hear many others around me echoing this same sentiment.

Speeding UpBut is time really speeding up, or is it just our perception that it is? The turning of one year into the next often causes me to reflect on the year that is ending. What did I accomplish? What did I say I wanted to accomplish that I may not have? And what do I want to accomplish in the year to come?

This reflection is why many people make New Year’s Resolutions – to remind them of what they want to accomplish. So often, these resolutions are forgotten, or even consciously thrown out the window before the end of January.

I heard a year or two ago that the pulse of the Earth has been getting faster. I found this quote several places online:

“Time is actually speeding up (or collapsing). For thousands of years the Schumann Resonance or pulse (heartbeat) of Earth has been 7.83 cycles per second, The military have used this as a very reliable reference. However, since 1980 this resonance has been slowly rising. It is now over 12 cycles per second! This mean there is the equivalent of less than 16 hours per day instead of the old 24 hours. “

It has me reflecting on time, and my appreciation of time. I’ve been given some opportunities in the past week, and I’m really having to take an honest look at how I use the time I have.

I often think that I can fit something that I want to do into my schedule. Looking ahead, I think, “Oh, I have time in the evenings  or weekends to do that, no problem!” But when the evenings come, I am exhausted from work, or I need to take time with my children, or someone phones, and suddenly it is time to sleep.

It comes down to two questions: What is my passion? And what is my purpose? When I look at the opportunities in that light, it is much easier to decide whether to say yes or no or not now. And keeping those questions in mind helps me stay focused as I set my goals for this coming year. Because when I am in alignment with my passion and my purpose, time flies because I am enjoying myself, and not because I have taken on too much.

Blessings,

Mary

Do you need help discovering your passion or your purpose? Do you need someone to keep you focused on the goals you have set for yourself? Do you need help setting goals? Consider hiring a life coach. I offer a free sample session to find out if we make a good team.

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Redefining Free Time

By Mary on October 10, 2011

Law of attraction teachers will say that to receive what you want, you have to know what you want. Be very clear about it.

For several years now, through coaching, meditation and journalling, as well as other tools, I have working to get clear on what I want. For me, it boils down to these three things:

  • Time freedom
  • Raise my vibration
  • Earn my living from my spiritual work

I’ve been actively working towards these three goals for over two years.

Free TimeRecently, I’ve noticed just how jam-packed my schedule is. Added responsibilities at work, rehearsing for a play, extra-curricular activities for my boys, and my own regular activities have left me with very little free time. That first goal feels ever so elusive right now!

One of my core beliefs is that my outer world is a reflection of my inner world. So it occurred to me during my morning meditation last week that perhaps my lack of free time has something to do with how I am thinking and talking about time.

I thought about that for a little while, and sure enough, all of my language about time was negative. “I don’t have time for that”, “when have I had time”, “in all my copious spare time” (read that last one with a heavy dose of sarcasm).

The past few days, I’ve been thinking about how I can change my thinking about time. It’s not been quite as clear as I had hoped. The first thing I need to realize is that I have chosen all of the things and activities that I am currently involved in.

I choose to go to work (the biggest allocation of my time) in service to my family, so we can continue to have a place to live and food to eat.

I chose to audition for the play, and then to accept the part I was offered. And I really am having fun and enjoying the new relationships I am building.

I chose to enroll my boys in karate, to encourage physical activity and self discipline.

I choose to continue writing my blog, and organizing my spiritual circle, and coach my clients. It fills me with joy to witness others grow and expand.

I really have more freedom than I thought I did, once I stop and re-frame how I see my time being used. Time freedom is more about who I am choosing to be, than what I am doing with my time.  Choosing to be in love and gratitude, no matter what I am doing, is my mission for this week!

Blessings,

Mary

PS. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone in Canada!

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Mourning a Masterpiece

By Mary on October 3, 2011

We’re in the process of downsizing. We’ll be moving in a few months, so we’re starting the process of getting rid of things now.

Elizabethan DressLast week, my husband listed a lot of things on eBay. I had gone through the costume closet (yes, I have a closet just for costumes) and pulled out several items I was ready to let go of. Or so I thought.

One costume was an Elizabethan style dress with a fully boned built in corset. I was ready to let it go because I thought I had outgrown it. Turns out, with the weight I have lost lately, I fit it again, as I discovered when I put it on to model for the pictures for eBay.

I said to my husband then, that if this dress didn’t sell, I wouldn’t be sad. In hindsight, I would have been better off had I given more attention to that feeling. We listed it, and all the other costumes, at ridiculously low starting bids, hoping they would get attention. So when my dress did get one bid, I felt terrible.

I was so much more attached to this dress than I thought. I made it 13 years ago, and I earned the fabric by doing some sewing for a friend. She didn’t think the two fabrics would o together, but I insisted, and I love the result. I worked on it for a few months, and put a lot of effort into it, including cutting and filing the metal boning backstage during a show I was working on. I had never made a corset dress before, and it turned out really well. I even won an award for best costume at a Sci-Fi Convention later that year, narrowly beating a friend of mine who is also a skilled seamstress.

With the help of my coach, I realized that this dress is one of my masterpieces. It shows my skill at sewing, my creative vision in moving from concept to finished product, and my eye for detail. And, darn it, it looks good on me!

Now I am packing it up to ship it off to someone I don’t know, for a fraction of the material cost.

Logically, I know that I could make another dress. I still have the pattern. And, of course, I have the skill. Emotionally, however, I am mourning the loss of my masterpiece. Spiritually, I know that letting go of one thing often opens up space for more and better to move in. So I allow myself to sit with this grief, even if it seems silly, and hold the vision that something better is on it’s way to me.

Reflecting back, it’s not letting go of the dress that I mourn so much as how little I valued my work.

Blessings,

Mary

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Changing My Mind to Change My Reality

By Mary on May 30, 2011

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” ~Albert Einstein

In coming out from my trip to the Underworld (otherwise known as emotional breakdown, depression, freak out, etc), I remembered this quote from Einstein.  If I really want to change my circumstances, I need to change how I think about them.

Change My MindI had two conversations last week with friends that helped me get more clarity about what it is that I am really wanting. (Incidentally, both of them are Peaceful Women.) The first happened by synchronicity – because it certainly wasn’t planned, nor was it an accident.

I was on the Peaceful Woman conference line because I thought there was supposed to be a group call.  Only three of us ended up being on the call, so we started to share what had been going on recently for each of us.  I listened to the exciting things that the other two had been doing, and I almost didn’t want to share. I did anyway, and one of the women asked me a question about my situation that many have asked before about why my husband doesn’t do something different.

My first thought was, “Great. Here I go again having to defend choices my husband and I have made.” I briefly explained, and she simply answered, “OK. That’s the vision that I will hold for you then.”

I was shocked. I thanked her right away, and told her how much it meant to me that she didn’t question me or my choices. She just accepted me, and told me she would hold positive space for me. It helped me realize that part of what contributed to my meltdown was having to defend my choices from other people’s suggestions. I was craving this kind of support – acceptance of where I am, and assistance in holding the vision of what I want to create.

Later in the week, I had the wonderful opportunity to speak with another Peaceful Woman who is also an amazing Life Coach.  She helped me find even more clarity about why I was feeling so stressed (by uncovering exactly what about my changed circumstances at work was challenging my values), and why I was sabotaging myself from continuing all my positive habits (because they are things I have control over, and I was feeling very out of control in other areas of my life). Simply having the higher awareness of what was really going on for me opened up the space in me to shift my perception.

She also acknowledged me for the growth I have experienced, and for the steps I have already taken to change my perception. I have spoken my truth more fully, and I am beginning to integrate this visit to the Underworld into my entire being, in support of positive change. By crying out to the Universe for help, and being honest that I don’t know what the next step is, the Universe has placed at least three new opportunities before me to provide the help I was asking for.

That’s another interesting shift for me. I don’t feel bad or regret having this meltdown, as I might have done in the past. It is not a sign of weakness. I know that this is part of a cycle towards my own spiritual evolution.

And so I am grateful for the opportunity to learn more about myself.  By getting such a clear message about what I don’t want, and taking the time to explore what led me to this place, I am so much more clear on what it is that I do want. I’m not all the way there yet. And I feel so much better about how I’ve begun.

Blessings,

Mary

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Resistance, the Enemy of Commitment

By Mary on January 31, 2011

“Whoa! That’s really bright!” my son remarked after we changed the lights above the dining room table. There are three bulbs, and over the previous week, two had blown.

“It’s amazing how quickly we become accustomed to things, isn’t it?” I answered back.

Later that night, we saw our neighbor who had had a heart attack a few months ago. “I’m feeling so much better than I did before the heart attack. I just thought how I felt before was normal.”

When the Universe puts the same message in my path twice in the same day, I have learned to take notice.

What in my life have I become accustomed to that no longer serves me? Where is my light dimmed?

I’ve fallen into a routine, and for the most part, I’m content with everything I’m doing. Most of it is moving me forward toward my goals. I think.

Well, I’m moving, but what is it that I’m moving toward?

It’s important to have goals. People who write their goals down are more likely to achieve them. I understand this. I’ve benefited from this in the past. My husband did his yearly planning and goal setting over Christmas. One of my assignments in an online course is to set goals. And I’ve totally avoided it.

Something has been holding me back. Something big enough that when I brought it up with my coach, I became quite emotional about it.

Cycle of Change

Cycle of Change

From www.lessons4living.com: Resistance can impact each of the six steps of the Cycle of Change.

At the step of “Something’s up?” you simply do not look ahead or ask any question about what is going on. At step two you refuse to name or even give the slightest acknowledgement to any problem. Don’t make any plans for action will stall you at step three as will never acting on plans you did make when you reach step four. You can resist at step five by never making any adjustments to plans that are implemented. At step six complacency will lull you into false security and you will not proactively look ahead to what is coming.

Through my coaching session, two things became clear to me. The first is that I feel like I already have a lot of commitments. If I make goals for more things, I risk tipping into overwhelm. I know that I have a tendency to take on too much at one time. So part of my resistance is to taking on more than I feel I can handle.

The second thing I got clear about was one of the teachings I have received several times over the past few years. The essence of it is that if I don’t keep my commitments, even the little ones to myself, the Universe won’t take me seriously. So I’m afraid of making commitments that I don’t think I could keep.

The solution my coach helped me to find was to set my goals for things I’m already doing. Simple, yet brilliant! I had been stuck thinking that I had to make goals to achieve new things.

I’m finally ready to complete my assignment. I’ll be setting my goals for things I’m already working on – firming up my commitments. I’m setting myself up for success.

CommitmentHow have you dealt with goal setting or resistance this year?

Blessings,
Mary

Resistance can impact each of the six steps of the Cycle of Change. At the step of “Something’s up?” you simply do not look ahead or ask any question about what is going on. At step two you refuse to name or even give the slightest acknowledgement to any problem. Don’t make any plans for action will stall you at step three as will never acting on plans you did make when you reach step four. You can resist at step five by never making any adjustments to plans that are implemented. At step six complacency will lull you into false security and you will not proactively look ahead to what is coming.

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Christmas and Birthdays and Yule, Oh My!

By Mary on December 20, 2010

It’s Sunday night, and I’m in the middle of making cupcakes for my youngest son’s birthday party tomorrow.  His birthday is later this week. Tomorrow night, I will be going to the Christmas party for my work.

Earlier today, we went to a Solstice Celebration and potluck.  Last week, I went to a surprise birthday party for a close friend of mine, and my middle son’s Christmas concert.  And earlier this month was my husband’s birthday.

It seems like this time of year is exceptionally busy, and not just for me.  Everyone I know has multiple events, invitations and gatherings.  I also happen to be a last minute Christmas shopper, mostly because of the other events earlier in the month!

While Santa day looms up ahead of me, this year I am extremely grateful that I have my meditation practice and now my Life Coach to help me keep my balance and stay centered.

The feeling of overwhelm has threatened to, well, overwhelm me several times in the past few weeks.  And I have been so much more able to catch myself as I start to drift into the anxiety because I start each morning with meditation and intentions.

And in my coaching session just this morning, my coach pointed out that I am accomplishing a lot, and I have more time to work on my projects coming up very shortly.  Thank you, Hazel!

Oh, and hot chocolate helps too! ;)

What are you doing to keep your cool during the “silly season”?

Blessings,

Mary

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Why Would I Hire a Life Coach?

By Mary on December 13, 2010

Many of you know, I recently attended Life Coach Training through Coach for Life.  I had an amazing and enlightening time, and I learned a lot–about myself as well as the coaching profession.

When I tell people that I am a Life Coach, most people don’t understand what I do. That’s understandable, even when I knew I was going to the training, I had a hard time describing what it was I was going to be learning how to do! And I often dismissed the idea of hiring a coach as frivilous.

Well, I have now changed my mind! And not just because I am now a coach myself… I have begun receiving coaching, and it has already made a difference for me.  So here are some of the reason I would hire a coach:

  • I want to accelerate my learning/growth/business

We all know that professional, high-performance athletes have coaches to help them get to the top of their game. A coach observes the client from the outside, and can therefore see things that the client may not be able to see about themselves.  By pointing out where I am excelling, and sometimes where I may be able to tweak my performance, my coach helps me grow much faster than I could on my own.

  • I want accountability

I used to joke in University that I wore the Crown of Procrastination.  I would wait until the very last minute to get my assignments completed.  Even now, I will find myself waiting until the last minute to prepare for a presentation, or read that book that I borrowed.  Each week I decide on action steps with my coach, and then I have to report back to her on my progress.  Now, she’s not going to get mad if I don’t complete a step.  In fact, I will probably be much harder on myself than she will.  However, just knowing that someone else knows what I have told myself that I am going to do makes me want to accomplish it even more.

  • I want to know what I am already doing well

So much of the time I am so busy in the “doing” of my life, I don’t necessarily catch myself in my brilliance.  My coach can see those things that I already do well, and she points them out to me.  It is a tremendous boost in my self esteem!

  • I want to find my own answers

I hold the belief that any question I can come up with, I also have the means to find the answer to.  On my own, I can get caught in a tape loop in my mind.  My coach helps me step out of that loop, by breaking the cycle.  Hearing myself speak out loud can often help me find my own inspiration, and if not, my coach has other tools to help me re-connect with my own Divine Source.

  • I want to raise my level of awareness

In case you missed it in any of the previous bullet points, my coach points out things I miss.  Whether it is a belief I am holding that may or may not be serving me, or something I am already doing that I didn’t think I was, my coach is a much more objective observer than I am.

I’ll close off with this quote from the Coach for Life website, in answer to the question, “What is coaching?”

Coaching is holding a space of total acceptance for your self and for your client as you facilitate the client’s self-discovery and re-connection to their inner most truths about them self – their qualities, their gifts and their life purpose. The coach also facilitates the client with their conscious alignment with their inner most truths in their everyday decisions. The coach’s role is to raise the level of consciousness of the client through questions that allow the client to choose what they want, what they are prepared to do and what they are prepared to commit to them self in the present moment. The coach is charged with the responsibility of supporting the client by asking them what awareness came up for them in doing (or not doing) the commitments the client had made to them self.

Blessings,

Mary

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How are Computers, Business and Emotions Related?

By Mary on December 6, 2010

My post is a bit late today, and it’s going to be pretty short.  I picked up a new-to-me computer last night, and I have a lot of programs to install, and a lot of data to transfer from my older computer to the newer one.

It’s not quite the computer I really want (a MacBook Pro with solid state hard drive – that one will be coming as soon as I have a few more coaching clients and web sales!).  And, it is definitely a step up from my old computer.

Sometimes it is easier to make big changes gradually.  Chunk it down, and take smaller steps to get where you want to go.  I’ve been working on doing this with my business , and with my emotions.

With my business, I would like to be completely self-employed, earning more than I need to live from my coaching business and website sales.  And that is too big of a step from where I am now for me to just up and quit my day job. :)   So I continue making little steps that move me in the direction I want to go.

For an emotional example, last week I was in the middle of preparing dinner for my family, when I got a call from work.  I was totally caught off guard, and ended up leaving the dinner preparations and driving to work, fuming the whole way.  I knew that I would have to be calm and peaceful if I was needed at work, but that was too big a jump from the emotion I was in at that moment.  So I started from where I was, and slowly went from anger to frustration, to irritation, to acceptance, to calm and peaceful.

The process is not instant, however I may wish it to be in all of these cases. It takes time, and conscious choice.  My goal right now is to be conscious of the choices I am making at all times.

Blessings,

Mary

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I AM a Powerful Manifestor!

By Mary on June 28, 2010

I just got back from my water aerobics class.  This isn’t really big news, I know.  But it is for me, because the pool was supposed to close for renovations last Friday.

Almost three weeks ago, I sat down with a couple of friends to set some goals for ourselves for the rest of the month.  I introduced them to Raymond Aaron’s Monthly Mentor goal setting program.  I don’t make any money from endorsing this program; I just believe it is an excellent system for making progress toward your goals.

I haven’t used it myself in quite some time.  So it was good for me to introduce it to my friends, and have others to support and be supported by in moving forward. One of the goals I set for myself was to start going to water aerobics again.  I set myself a goal of  attending a minimum of two classes, a target of three classes, and my outrageous goal for myself was attending five classes.  I thought I had three weeks to acheive this.

Then I found out that the pool was closing June 25th for maintenance and renovations.  So I had only two weeks to acheive my goal! I made the comment several times that I was disappointed that just as I was getting back into going to the classes, the pool was closing and I would not be able to keep up the momentum I was creating for myself.  I pushed myself in my schedule, and I managed to get to five classes in two weeks!

At class last Friday morning, it was announced that the pool would be open for four more weeks.  The architect needed more time.  The fitness schedule would be quite limited, but the deep water class I attend is on at the time I prefer to attend, and on the three days of the week I attend.

However indirectly, I told the Universe that I wanted to continue with water aerobics, and the Universe provided the opportunity for me!

This isn’t the only experience I have had of manifesting I have had recently, but it is one of the most obvious.  What I observe about myself in this situation, is that I did not directly ask the Universe to keep the pool open.  I took action, going to the deep water class at every opportunity in my schedule.  I enjoyed the feeling of working out, and I expressed disappointment at the thought of not continuing.

I find I am often challenged in the manifestation process by not taking action, or by getting stuck in the feeling of what I don’t want.  Or I manifest unconsciously.  I don’t always consciously choose what I want to create in my life.  Between The Peaceful Woman’s Inspired Living Coaching series, and getting back into utilizing the MAINLY goal setting system, I am working on becoming more conscious of being a co-creator of my life.  I am creating my reality in alignment with my intentions and desires.  I AM a powerful manifestor, and I am so grateful!

What tools do you use to set goals and stay focused on your visions?

Blessings,

Mary

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