Saturday was my last day of work for about a month and a half. I’ve known this day was coming for several months, so I have had lots of time to deal with the scarcity conversation about money, and I’m actually pretty calm about that. I trust that the Universe is taking care of me in that respect.
The lack and scare-city reared its head in a different way last week, though. Before I received the layoff notice, I had been planning to go camping with a group of friends this weekend. I had submitted my request for the time off, and I was really looking forward to it, because I had missed it the last several years (because of work). Once the notice came, though, that ended all thoughts of having this weekend off. I needed to be there to help shut things down, and I wanted the money for the coming time off.
I was bummed, of course. So my family started thinking about heading down just for the last night, after I got off work. There was going to be a ritual Saturday night, so we would still be included in some of the festivities.
Then last week we heard that the ritual was going to be at 5 pm instead of 7. There was no way we could be there for 5. And I started questioning whether it would be worth driving the two plus hours to get there if we would be missing all the events of the weekend. Then one of my mentors offered to do a couple of workshops, and I felt even more that I was missing out. The “poor me” voice in my head was having a heyday!
I was feeling bad, which means I am out of alignment with myself. I asked myself what I was really upset about. This event was bringing up all the times I had missed out on something because I had to work, or because I have children. I thought I had dealt with that and taken responsibility for the choices I have made already! And why was I suddenly feeling the scarcity of missing out on this one experience? Most people would still be freaking out about having enough money to last for the layoff.
And then the insight struck me. I’m not truly open to receive abundance financially if I am focused on the lack in other areas of my life. If what I focus on I receive more of, then focusing on missing this experience is not where I want to place my attention and energy!
I started looking for the abundance of other experiences I was having, or could be having. I enjoyed a wonderful potluck with other staff and Board members from work at a beautiful home on Quadra Island overlooking the Straight of Georgia. The next night I had a very enjoyable and entertaining evening with some girlfriends, one of whom has moved to another village several hours away, and was here for just the one night. On the way home I saw the stunning Aurora Borealis. I went for a walk with another friend to a beautiful park called Nymph Falls, and shared some good conversation with her.
And probably the most important – I got to sleep in my own bed! (Me and the ground don’t see eye to eye when it comes to sleeping.)
I am grateful for the abundance and variety of experiences I was blessed with this weekend, even if I missed out on other experiences. I trust that I was exactly where I needed to be this weekend, doing exactly what I needed to be doing, with exactly the right people. Thank you all!
Where are you having “lack” conversations, and how can you shift them to abundant conversations?