An Apple, Windows and Communication Breakdown

There’s been a fair bit of communication breakdown in my life lately. First it was with members of my Circle, then it was with my phone and my computer. It even came up for one of my coaching clients this week.

I have an iPhone, and a PC. I recently received some training audios that I wanted to put on my phone so I could listen to them while I was doing other things, and not be stuck at my computer. I also wanted to get the latest videos off my phone to edit them. For whatever reason, my phone and my computer were not communicating with each other.

It was so frustrating! It should have been easy. Connect the phone to the computer, and tell them to sync. They would go through the motions, and in the end tell me there was a time out.

I think you misinterpretedThe problem in my Circle started with text. One person commented, and the other person received a completely different message. Just like the phone and the computer. One sent a message that was not fully received by the other.

It can be so challenging to read the intention behind the written word. It is too easy to read insult where none is intended. It is said that anywhere between 60-70% of the meaning we receive comes from non-verbal cues, the tone of voice and body language that goes with the words. When we are reading words on a page or a screen, the majority of the context of how we derive meaning is missing!

So what happens? We make it up. We imagine the person talking. We run the words through our firewall, our filters of experience. And if we have had negative experiences with that person, or even in general, the meaning we come up with often takes a negative tone. The firewall shuts it down, and we stop communicating.

Which is exactly what happened with my phone and my computer. To get them to communicate, I had to shut down the firewall, and voila! The transfer of information actually worked.

With the members in my Circle, it was a similar story. I met the two of them on neutral ground, and asked each one to share what was going on for them, without interpreting what they were receiving from the other person. In other words, without the firewall. Once they each had an opportunity to share, and really hear what the other person was saying, there was no more conflict.

Where in your life is your firewall shutting down real communication? And are you willing to take down your firewall to fix it?

Blessings,

Mary

What Do You Do With Moments of Doubt?

It’s the beginning of September, and I am really no closer to having a completed course to share with you than I was at the beginning of August. I have a great idea, or at least what I think is a great idea, and I have yet to flesh it out and give it substance.

I’ve been allowing myself to be distracted by other things – anything, really – that are keeping me from creating content for you. I’ve told myself that these things are important, and they truly are. Yet I am letting my blog writing and video recording and editing, and updating my website, and evaluating a training opportunity to keep me from my course.

So this morning I had to ask myself, what’s going on here? I know how to accomplish what I want, I understand what I need to do, and I am very aware of time passing. What’s up?

Fear of FailureDoubt. I’m doubting that I have something to say that you will find valuable. I’m doubting that I can turn everything I have learned into a course that makes sense. I’m doubting that I have what it takes to help you transform your life.

There. I said it.

All this doubt really comes down to a fear of failure. I am afraid to put myself, my reputation, my word and my integrity on the line in case I fail to live up to my word, my reputation and my integrity. Keeping my word is extremely important to me. If I say I’m going to do something, it is a matter of honor that I follow through and keep my commitment.

And yet I’ve given my word to create this course.

I’ve heard that when you are faced with fear, and it is not something actually life threatening, then it means you are on the right track. If that is the case, then it means I am on the right track by creating this course.

I’ve named my fear, I’ve acknowledged it. Now it is time to face it. Feel the fear and do it anyway.

Here is my commitment: I commit to writing down my initial idea for the Elements of Abundance course and working through the concept worksheet given to me by my mentor in the next two weeks.

Now my reputation and my integrity is REALLY on the line! 🙂 However, I have written it down now, and words have power. I’m using the written word to keep me accountable.  And I’m feeling my doubts and fears fade even as I make this commitment.

How do you handle moments of doubt? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below.

New Meditations Available and Coupon Code for Half Price

Happy Labor Day! Today’s post will be short and sweet. If you haven’t browsed around the site lately, there are a few new meditations available.

Spiritual Grounding Guided Meditation

Spiritual Grounding Guided Meditation

First, the free stuff! I still plan to do another teleseminar about the benefits of grounding, and until then, you can download the Spiritual Grounding Guided Meditation here, my gift to you!

 

A Walk with Kali Guided Meditation

A Walk with Kali Guided Meditation

I have been extremely remiss in getting the Walks With the Goddess guided meditations uploaded on the site here. As of today, I am all caught up!

 

 

 

A Walk with Baba Yaga Guided Meditation

A Walk with Baba Yaga Guided Meditation

A Walk with Kali Guided Meditation, A Walk with Baba Yaga Guided Meditation, and A Walk with Artemis Guided Meditation are all now available.

 

A Walk with Artemis Guided Meditation

A Walk with Artemis Guided Meditation

I’ve just sent my artist, Katana Leigh, two more meditations. We hope to have them available for you soon!

For the next week, you can get any of the guided meditation audios on the site for HALF OFF! Use coupon code LABORDAY. And enjoy your time off!

Blessings,

Mary

I Did a Mis-Take – Time for Take 2!

In my last post, I talked about time freedom, and how much I have enjoyed it this summer. And I also talked about some of the things I didn’t get done, and how I am going to miss my time freedom when I go back to work.

Take 2: My Abundant LifeSTOP! CANCEL! DO OVER!

You see, I was getting caught up in the future, and in worry. I was starting to worry about how I was going to manage keeping up with this 30/60 challenge, and finish creating the Elements of Abundance Program for you while I am back at work. I was allowing myself to fall into old patterns of lack.

And that is definitely NOT the energy I want to be in. I’ve gotten a lot better at catching myself when I start to fall into lack conversations in my mind about money, and I am able to change that conversation pretty quickly.

Now I need to work on catching myself when lack creeps into my thoughts about time. I often focus more on what I have yet to do than on what I have already completed. And then I get frustrated that I am not doing enough, or not working quickly enough. And yet, I often hear comments from my friends about how amazed they are at all the things I do accomplish. There is always going to be a long list of things I want to do. As much as I cross things off it, I am always adding to it!

I need to remember not to judge my success by the length of my to do list, rather to feel successful based on what I have done. I also need to remember to take my own advice: there are no unrealistic goals, only unrealistic timelines.

I am grateful for my friends (Jamie, in this particular instance) who remind me to look at all the abundance in my life, including time and productivity. I am shifting back into my abundant reality, and enjoying the feeling of more than enough.

It’s so nice that life give us the chance for do-overs! I’m ready for take 2!

Blessings,

Mary

A Taste of (Time) Freedom

I’ve been off work for almost seven weeks now, and it has flown by. I’ve done a lot this summer – I’ve started this blog and video challenge, and I’m about half way through. I’ve recorded videos and recorded meditations, written one course and come up with a concept for another course I plan to teach. I’ve gone to the beach, and spent time with my children, and had surgery. I’ve attended Pagan Pride celebrations in two different cities. I went whale watching!

There are also a lot of things I didn’t do this summer. Things I had hoped to accomplish, and for whatever reason, just did not get to. There are meditations and courses I wanted to write, and meditations I wanted to record. I had planned to do yoga, and travel a bit more. Even though there is still a lot I would like to do and experience, summer vacation is almost over. The children go back to school and I go back to work next week.

Free TimeI am so grateful for the abundance of time that I had this summer. I have had a taste of time freedom, the freedom to choose what I do with my time. One of my major goals ever since I began this website has been to earn enough from my coaching and guided meditations to have time freedom. It takes a lot of effort and learning to be successful, and to be honest, I am still learning how to market myself. I’m still discovering what my message is and how to share it with the world.

That little taste has definitely left me wanting more! Though there were days I felt I didn’t achieve much, I learned that I have the discipline to put energy into and work at my business every day. I was finding my balance between work and play, filling my cup to spill over to others, planning ahead and taking advantage of opportunities that arose in the moment.

I could bemoan how challenging it is going to be to go back to working for someone else, to trading my time for money. Instead I am going to treasure the memory of this summer, and hold it as an example of what I am working towards. And I think I need to add the words “TIME FREEDOM” to the vision board hanging above my desk. I may not be there yet, but I am well on my way!

What is one of your big goals, and what are you doing to realize it?

Blessings,

Mary

Doing Nothing to Increase Productivity

I admit it, I overdid it.

Saturday was Nanaimo Pagan Pride Day. Last year, our Circle performed the main ritual for the day. This year, another group was scheduled for that task. Several members of our Circle had items they wanted to sell, so we booked vendor space. My intention was to sell my guided meditations, and share information about our church. I also agreed to do a one-hour workshop during the event.

About two weeks before the event, there was a call for volunteers to help with onsite tasks. I signed up to support all the people (many of whom are friends of mine) who put in so much effort leading up to the event. There were supposed to be quite a few members from our Circle attending, and they would be able to watch our booth while I was working.

Two days before the event, I was invited to play a part in the main ritual. Since I am always keen to participate, I said yes. My theater training comes in handy at times like this!

The day before the event, I found out that one key person who was going to be selling items at the event had decided not to go because of a miscommunication. My family had another commitment Friday night that ran longer than anticipated, and so I got to bed later than I would have preferred. And my youngest son woke up sick just after 3 am. I ended up cleaning him up twice, and not really falling back to sleep.

On four hours sleep, and two large mugs of tea, off we went to the event. At the site, I turned on. We set up the booth, and got ready for the event to officially begin. Thirty minutes before the opening ritual, the event organizer came up to ask me for help. He needed a priestess for the opening ritual, since the priestess he usually works with had a baby last week. Of course, I agreed.

My day had gone from some commitment to a very full day. My energy held out all day – I think I was running on performance adrenalin. I even made it through dinner after the event, still feeling pretty good. I had thought I might sleep on the way home, but my husband was also pretty tired, and needed to talk to stay awake on the 90 minute drive.

Doing nothing is very importantWe made it home safely, and fell right into bed. When I finally woke up on Sunday, I got dressed like it was going to be a normal, productive day. Only it wasn’t. I did nothing all day. Well, not entirely nothing. I watched a movie with my children, did one load of laundry, and played games on my phone. I tried to read a book, but I couldn’t keep focused on it. I also made dinner for the boys and myself.

Throughout the day I kept thinking that there were other things I could be doing. And I gave myself permission to just be where I was, low energy and all.

Monday was still a bit low energy, though I was much more prepared to take action on blogs and video and coaching. I was very grateful for the time I gave myself to do nothing. It was definitely necessary for recharging my batteries!

What do you do to recharge?

Blessings,

Mary

What’s the Meaning of This?

I mentioned a couple of posts ago that I injured myself within a short time of arriving at Vancouver Pagan Pride last Saturday. Shortly after arriving at the park where the event was being held, I went to use the bathroom. It was one of those “vandalism-proof” bathrooms that looks more like a prison than a bathroom. After washing my hands, I stepped out of the bathroom, and my left foot caught the edge of the ramp, turned, and I landed on the ground. My shoe landed in the bathroom behind me and my sunglasses went flying. The first injuries I noticed were my left ankle, which had turned, and my right knee was scraped and bleeding. My palms were a little scraped, as was my right elbow, though not bleeding.

As the day wore on, my left ankle didn’t hurt anymore, but my right wrist, shoulder and hip were all quite achy. It wasn’t until the next day that the bruises showed up.

I’ve been thinking about what the message for me could be from this injury. Two statements have been running through my mind:

  • Everything happens for a purpose.
  • Nothing has meaning except the meaning that you give it.

One possibility is that I wasn’t grounded. We spent the night before on a friend’s sofa bed, and got up very early to make the ferry, and I skipped my morning meditation.

With the help of a friend, Sandy March, who also does amazing Akashic Record Clearing, I explored other possible meanings a few days later. The first thing she pointed out was that all of the lasting injuries happened on my right side, and the right side of the body has to do with the future. I mentioned that all of the major joints on my right side except my ankle were hurt when I fell. Using Louise Hay’s book You Can Heal Your Life and Karol Truman’s Feelings Buried Alive Never Die we determined that joints have to do with changing direction and moving forward.

Another synchronicity that came up for me while we were talking is that the goddess Hecate has been present for me ever since I went to the Mother Church in Index at the end of June. Yesterday I read this article about Hecate. It says She is primarily a goddess of change.

Looking for MeaningWe looked at what was going on just before I fell. I was getting out of “prison” (the bathroom), and tripped on the first step. It wasn’t even a particularly difficult step. I just wasn’t giving it the attention that it needed.

The conclusion we came to is that change is coming in my life. (Duh, change is constant!) And I need to give my full attention to the first step, or it is going to trip me up. Now I am more aware, and I can make sure I am giving my full attention to the actions I take, and not stepping without looking.

Of course, it could still mean nothing more than that I fell.

Blessings,

Mary

 

How Do You Know if it is the Right Opportunity?

This week my mentor contacted me about a new opportunity to learn from her mentor. He’s involved with a new company that is launching a new service in about a month. To assist people that join his team, he is offering all of his training materials for free to those who sign up.

Tough DecisionNow, I have a very healthy skepticism when it comes to any network marketing. I’ve put it my time, in quite a number of different companies. At one point, I was involved in something like 4 or 5 different MLM companies at the same time! I hosted parties, I paid for training, I bought leads and did cold calling, all of it, and with very little success.

Don’t get me wrong. I believe network marketing is a viable system, and I don’t knock the people who have found success with it. I also think that I am not the right kind of person to really do well with network marketing. All the attempts and failures have really jaded me that it will work for me. And all the hype that tends to go with MLM opportunities? It kind of makes my skin crawl.

Theoretically, that’s not what I would be joining this particular opportunity for. I would be joining it for the access to my mentor’s mentor. And what a fantastic opportunity that is – he never offers his training this inexpensively.

Unfortunately, and especially after talking things over with my husband, I cannot justify the expense right now, even for the training. No matter how much I want to. I tell myself that if I worked just a little and signed up a few people, it would pay for my training, and hey, maybe even earn me a little extra money, too!

In meditation this morning, a song lyric kept going through my mind:

You leave a lot to be desired,

But I still desire you.

To me that says even though part of me wants to accept this offer, there is still something missing.

I also have to honor my husband’s opinion. And when I really check in with myself, my heart isn’t in it. But is that just the regret of having to pass up a good opportunity? I don’t have the sales skills to do this again. It would take me away from creating the course I want to create and share with you. On the other hand, this would help me learn more of the sales skills I need to be able to share the course with you.

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! I’m torn!

What do you think? If you are in the US (its not available in Canada yet, another strike against it for me at the moment), would you be interested in an opportunity to get unlimited mobile service, data and text for $49/month, with the possibility for being paid back for referring your friends? If so, send me an email and I will invite you to the opportunity. I’d give you a direct link, but you have to invite people individually. If no one emails, I totally understand – this isn’t the right time for me to enter this opportunity.

Blessings,

Mary

You Want Me to Do What?

I saw this on a friend’s Facebook page the other day, and it really struck me:

Patricia Snyder wrote:

Please, choose your leaders carefully. Do not follow them blindly for you may not know what drives them. Learn to question their motives; don’t assume they have your best interests at heart. Look for maturity and wisdom over flash. Remember, a true leader will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. Leadership is not a popularity contest. Leaders choose their words carefully because they know that their words hold weight. Leadership is a calling, not a prize.

Let me repeat that last line: Leadership is a calling, not a prize. I’ve known a few people that seemed to think leadership is a prize to be won because he/she was the fastest/loudest/strongest/whatever-est. And they are definitely not inspiring. In fact, often I want to run in the other direction when I encounter those kind of “leaders”.

Lead by exampleIt also makes me think of my experience at Enlightened Warrior Training Camp a few years ago. At the beginning of the week, the gigantic group of over 400 of us was divided into smaller “tribes” of about 20 or so people. Once we were in in our tribes, we introduced ourselves, and shared what we brought to the group. Almost everyone said they brought leadership. So I didn’t. I remember thinking, “With all of these leaders, I will be able to be a follower! I don’t have to be the one in charge.” The qualities I decided to bring to the group were love and non-judgment.

Fast forward a couple of days. There was a lot that happened there that I cannot share with you – like the Mysteries, is is something that must be experienced to be understood. One of the group tasks for each tribe was to come up with some kind of chant to describe and unite our group. Ideally there should be a physical component to it. We weren’t given a lot of time to come up with it, in between all the other tasks we were given. Our group discussed it on the way to dinner one day, and could not come to any conclusion. I said I would come up with something.

I used the same process I use for writing meditations. I had an idea of what I wanted to say. I thought about it while I did other things, putting a few words together here and there in my head. After a few hours, I wrote it out, and shared it with the group the following day.

They loved it, and they were worried about remembering it all. I said I could do most of it on my own, and the rest of the group could join in at the end and do the actions. There was some concern over whether I would be able to be loud enough, and I told them not to worry. I would be plenty loud when the time came. And I let the others, the ones who said they brought leadership to our group, sort out the rest of the details.

The time came to present our chant to the rest of the group. Again, some of the leaders were concerned about volume. I asked for their trust once again.

Other tribes did theirs, and everyone cheered for everyone else. Finally it was our turn. I took a deep breath and began. The whole tent, 400+ people, became quiet, and erupted into applause when we were done. Even my own tribe was stunned, and pleased.

I didn’t ask to be the leader of our tribe. I didn’t even set that intention. Yet there I was, leading a group of leaders, not because I felt I was better than them, but because inspiration had chosen me to speak up. And, to be perfectly honest, there is a part of me that enjoys being in the spotlight. I earned the respect of my tribe by speaking quietly to begin with, and only shouting when it was our turn to be heard above the crowd.

In my priestess work, it’s been a similar story. I started out looking for a group to join, and was told repeatedly, “If you start one, I’ll come.” The Universe was sending me a message in no uncertain terms to lead.

I don’t always feel ready or prepared to lead. I hope I can live up to the standards of the quote above. I strive for maturity and wisdom. I do my best not to tell people only what they want to hear, even if sometimes it is really difficult to say what they need to hear. I do choose my words carefully.

If you have any feedback for me on how I am showing up as a leader, I’d love to hear it. Even if it may not be what I want to hear.

Blessings,

Mary

Are You Putting Off Your Passion?

This weekend I attended Vancouver Pagan Pride Day. It was a wonderful opportunity to see how different traditions celebrate and connect to the Divine, and I am grateful that I was able to go, in spite of injuring myself within 10 minutes of arriving on the site, but that’s a different post.

I led a workshop while I was there called “Energy Basics: Grounding and Shielding”, which went very well, even if it was a bit rushed. At the end of the workshop I passed out some business cards for Walks Within so that the people who attended could download the meditations I shared in the workshop (the grounding one is coming soon, I promise!).

Love for moneyOne woman asked me what was involved in the life coaching. I told her that I help her connect to her values and life purpose, raise her awareness, and keep her accountable to what she says she wants to do. I also shared a little bit about the Elements of Abundance program I am working on to help people earn their living from their passion.

The discussion turned to that old lie I keep bumping into: Money is evil.

Once upon a time, somewhere back in my churchgoing days, I was told that money is the root of all evil. And since I was told that when I was an impressionable child, it has stuck with me. Money, or as my husband would correct me, currency, is not evil. It is an inanimate object. It is not inherently good or evil just as a stone is not good or evil.

For the record, the actual quote from the bible is:

For the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. And some people, craving money, have wandered from the true faith and pierced themselves with many sorrows.

~1 Timothy 6:10, New Living Translation

Money is a form of energy. You can use it for good or for evil, although that implies that there is a way that is right and one that is wrong, and I don’t totally buy into that anyway. How you direct that energy, how you earn and spend your money, is what is important.

Somewhere along the line, many of us got off track with how we earn our money. I know I certainly have. I hold a job that I am not passionate about because I need to cover the basic needs for myself and, more importantly, for my family.

Don’t get me wrong, there are parts of my job that I enjoy. I do my best there, because I believe in making my piece of the world as beautiful and positive as I can. It is still not my passion. My passion is seeing other people grow personally and spiritually. That’s why I am a life coach and a priestess outside my 9 to 5 job.

So many people I know have a job that is outside of their passion, including the young woman I was talking to at Pagan Pride. I totally understand the motivation to earn money to cover your needs from whatever source is available. My question is, what are you doing to fulfill your passion? If you’re not doing anything, what is one small thing you could change to bring you a little closer to your dream life? You’ll be amazed at how much richer your life will be when you engage your passion and purpose.

Blessings,

Mary