The other day on Facebook, this picture caught my eye:
It was paired with the following quote (thank you, Erica Boersma):
“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” ~ Les Brown
It was perfect timing for me, as I was contemplating the idea of stepping out of my comfort zone.
For some time now, I feel I have been in a bit of a holding pattern. There are many things I would like to do, and yet I need to be able to feed my children. So I continue working at my day job, tinkering away at several other projects on the side, and hoping that a miracle will happen, or deus ex machina will save me from my routine.
I understand that for my situation to change, *I* must change. And still, fear holds me back. I chose to bring these three amazing children into this world, and I chose the responsibility that goes along with it. So how can I make a choice that threatens their very survival?
In my coaching work, I encourage others to trust that the Universe will provide. And if I were my only responsibility, I would absolutely trust. Its not just me though. Others depend on me for food and shelter. So how do I reconcile that with my trust (or in this case, the lack of trust) in the Universe?
I am definitely feeling like the figure in the drawing, walking a tightrope between who I am now, and who I want to be. And at any moment, fear or love could tip the balance and send me plummeting down or racing forward. Or, the choice could leave me frozen in space, not willing to step forward or backward.
There are times when I think it would be easier if I were less aware. I could go to work and watch television and not know how much more was out there to experience. Yet, Oliver Wendell Holmes spoke true when he said,
The mind, once expanded to the dimensions of larger ideas, never returns to its original size.
So I shall wait for the fear to pass, and turn my mind to thoughts of love and abundance, and pray that change comes easily and joyfully.
Have any of you ever faced a major decision in your life that affected others, including yourself? How did you deal with it? I’d love to hear from you in the comments.