Choosing Love or Choosing Fear?

The other day on Facebook, this picture caught my eye:

Fear vs. Love

Fear vs. Love

It was paired with the following quote (thank you, Erica Boersma):

“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” ~ Les Brown

It was perfect timing for me, as I was contemplating the idea of stepping out of my comfort zone.

For some time now, I feel I have been in a bit of a holding pattern.  There are many things I would like to do, and yet I need to be able to feed my children.  So I continue working at my day job, tinkering away at several other projects on the side, and hoping that a miracle will happen, or deus ex machina will save me from my routine.

I understand that for my situation to change, *I* must change. And still, fear holds me back.  I chose to bring these three amazing children into this world, and I chose the responsibility that goes along with it.  So how can I make a choice that threatens their very survival?

In my coaching work, I encourage others to trust that the Universe will provide.  And if I were my only responsibility, I would absolutely trust. Its not just me though. Others depend on me for food and shelter. So how do I reconcile that with my trust (or in this case, the lack of trust) in the Universe?

I am definitely feeling like the figure in the drawing, walking a tightrope between who I am now, and who I want to be.  And at any moment, fear or love could tip the balance and send me plummeting down or racing forward. Or, the choice could leave me frozen in space, not willing to step forward or backward.

There are times when I think it would be easier if I were less aware.  I could go to work and watch television and not know how much more was out there to experience.  Yet, Oliver Wendell Holmes spoke true when he said,

The mind, once expanded to the dimensions of larger ideas, never returns to its original size.

So I shall wait for the fear to pass, and turn my mind to thoughts of love and abundance, and pray that change comes easily and joyfully.

Have any of you ever faced a major decision in your life that affected others, including yourself?  How did you deal with it?  I’d love to hear from you in the comments.



6 Responses

  1. Hey Babe,

    YOU know, that fear is an emotional block of the ego. YOU know, The Universe can “only” give you what your heart desires IF and only When you are in “total” alignment with what you are asking. WHEN you meditate and when you are in the space in between, (your vortex) YOU know that is where you may ask The Universe “anything” that sends your rockets of desire up.
    Am I wrong?

    Fear, is where and when I question, “what is next”, where do I need to be, what is it I must do next? It does not always come when I “think” I want or need it, however, IT comes (the answer). YOU already KNOW you have every thing you need right here right now. The question is not of the “fear”….it is of THE TRUST.

    WHEN I trust ME, my ennate BEING is in charge. THIS is when I receive because “I” am no longer the block. With your permission…I invite you to “sit” with any question you have about this subject, and “allow”, in your quiet moments the answers.

    It comes down to Trusting your enate BEING……Or not.
    With a plan…Are you “willing” to take a step towards your Greatness ??

  2. I hear ya, sister!
    I fight this fight every day. If it was just me, I could be a lot more daring at pursuing my goals, but I have a small person who depends on me, and I don’t have anyone to fall back on.
    It’s a tough one…
    Having said that, I have never been homeless, and I have never been hungry. The universe has always provided for me.
    Maybe I’m just afraid to have faith.

  3. The illustration you provided is poignant and descriptive. We constantly walk a balance between the two opposing forces: love and fear. Deciding which “voice” to listen to is an ongoing challenge.

    In response to your question, I feel that every decision you make affects not only you, but everyone else, to a greater or lesser degree. Because we are all interconnected, nothing we do or think is isolated, even though we may never know the ramifications of our thoughts, words, feelings, and deeds. At the same time, we are constantly influenced by the thoughts, words, feelings, and deeds of others, although we may not realize this either.

    Things might be easier if you were less aware…but certainly less vibrant. Easy isn’t necessarily the goal. In my opinion, living with awareness, from a place of love, is what it’s all about. Fear always inter-fears with that objective. When we truly connect with and flow with the energy of love, life becomes instantly easier and more joyful.

    Thanks for your insightful comments.
    Be well,
    Skye Alexander
    author of The Best Meditations on the Planet

  4. Thank you, Rebecca. I am right there with you. I’ve never been homeless, and never been hungry. But even the thought of my children being hungry or homeless has me sobbing with tears. I agree, the Universe has always provided for me, though not always in the ways I had hoped or expected. I can relate to being afraid to have faith. Or more faith. Because I do have some faith. It’s just not big enough for the leap I think I need to make.

  5. Hi Keiki. Yep. It’s all about the trust. Do I trust the Universe enough to take care of me if I make a choice that is not at all logical or rational? I’m working to re-align myself with the vision of stepping out. I know the fear storm has knocked me off my alignment. I really want to be provided for first. So that’s what I need to align with. And round and round we go. 🙂

  6. Thank you, Skye. It is a constant, moment by moment choice. Am I feeding fear or love? How about now?

    I don’t know if I am reassured or feel more pressure at the thought of affecting and being affected by all of humanity! LOL! And yet, it somehow gives me more courage to choose love, if only because it helps lift everyone up to make that choice more often and more naturally.

    And you’re right. I didn’t choose to come into this life because it would be easy. I came for the wide range of experiences. So, in a way, I am grateful for my moments of deep fear, because it helps me to appreciate the times when I am joyful all the more!